Depression after a divorce - how to deal with it?

When a marriage breaks up, we experience extreme emotional states. How to cope with the heaviest?

The research shows that divorce, after the death of a loved one is one of the most traumatic experiences in our lives. As a result, of this suffer the whole family, especially if the marriage that fell apart, there are children. Despite this, every year hundreds of thousands of divorcing couples, and the trend is upward. Divorced spouses experiencing together an average of 14 years, although alarming is the phenomenon of quick divorces among couples 25 years of age.

Why is the divorce? The most common reason given by the spouses are: mismatch (incompatibility), failure to fidelity, alcohol abuse by one of the spouses, misunderstandings financial reprehensible attitude to family members, housing difficulties and physical, sexual mismatch, prolonged absence, ideological differences.




Because feeling has expired

Regardless of who makes the decision to divorce, a painful experience that a negative toll on the psyche. They are suffering women and men. Here is the entry of one of the Internet: "I am in the course of separation, but most likely it comes to divorce. We were a young married couple, 1.5 years seniority. We were with each other very well, until - when the difference of character began to give life a misery - colloquially speaking, we do not get along. His wife decided to move out to another city, like that for a trial period, to think, relax, and finally found that feeling in it expired and does not want to come back to me. Throughout this period, I asked her very much, we talked to each other, trying to save it all, heal grievances and resentment that we need to work on their own characters and the relationship ... nothing helped

After leaving, I returned to my family home and live with my mother (which is also not a good idea). I returned in acute depression, which stems from the sense of loss of meaning in life after separation. I had a visit with a neurologist-psychiatrist. Enjoying syntaxin, approx ... but generally nothing. I do not want to do anything. I am 30 years old and it seems to me that this is the end of my life, I think that I'm going to die and I will never never be put happiness.
Author statement admits that he lost all interest. "There is only despair and lack of hope. I try to explain myself, that life still ahead of me, but I have no joy in life itself ... Nothing at all, only pessimism. I admit that this is in large part by the fact that there is still much I love my wife and I would like to fix things and work on ourselves and our relationship, but she says that it has expired feeling and nothing can do about it. I do not know quite how I live now. "

The loss of the meaning of life

The situation of the Internet user is difficult, because of him feeling did not work out. The prospect of divorce with the person you love is bestowed, it is therefore very painful. Lose a sense of meaning, it is the great emptiness.

Depression can, however, also appear in the marriage, which was not successful. Paulina discussion forum tells his story: "My husband left me three years ago, he left me with a daughter in debt, even forgot about us, and trains with his new woman of her child, at a not cradles, does not remember the birthday, me treats as an enemy, sometimes will travel next to our house car, I do not know why. He left us with the day-to-day, as it turned out deceived me right from the beginning.

Although the marriage of Paulina was unsuccessful, and divorce a few years have passed, the woman is still in disarray. "Until now, I can not pick up, I fell ill with depression, the drugs did not help, and therapy with a psychologist I do not have money, I'd want to get out of this, but I do not give advice, I have no one to talk to, I have only my mother but it is showing its age, and I do not want her to worry. Please help me, I do not know how, because I am not able to bear, I start to have bad thoughts, sometimes I think about suicide. "

Divorce destroys the psyche

When a marriage breaks down, we are accompanied by different feelings: disbelief, denial, uncertainty, distrust of others, despair, tear, loneliness, a feeling of emptiness, regret. And there are other depression symptoms - sleep problems (insomnia or hypersomnia), loss of appetite (or on the contrary, absorb enormous amounts of food), fatigue, loosening emotional, guilt, problems with concentration and memory, prone to aggressive behavior, a drastic decrease self-esteem. It may also be the melting sorrow in alcohol, and in some cases, suicide attempt.

Experts point out that all the feelings that accompany us during the divorce, are normal and virtually everyone experiences them. Therefore, psychologists argue that it is worth afford to cry. It is good at this difficult time to surround a close, trusted people. It might help to write a diary. The struggle with the emotions will only lead to a temporary jamming - with sometimes explode with much greater force. And the sooner you go through the most difficult period, the sooner you stand on your feet and you'll be ready to lay her life anew.

To identify depression is necessary to observe the typical symptoms - include depressed mood, sleep disturbances, considerably slowing or agitation, withdrawal, changes in appetite, weight loss (although it happens that people with depression eat a lot), loss of interest, lack of feeling of joy, even from activities that used to be enjoyed, feelings hopelessness, lack of emotional response to certain events, apathy, lower resistance to fatigue, recurrent thoughts of death and / or suicidal thoughts - implemented or not.

What to do in such a situation?

Permit yourself to experience difficult emotions and return to your loved ones is one thing. Depression after the divorce should be treated. You should go to a psychologist or psychiatrist. Your doctor will probably advise you to take antidepressants or mood stabilizers. Very important it is also psychotherapy. In many towns, there are support groups for divorced. Participation in these meetings will help you deal with the pain. You will be heard, you will also know how your pain after a divorce deal others.

One of the Internet adds: "The end of a relationship, that from what I know from life, usually the loss of meaning, because it ends with something, what we believed. To the despair, pain ... But this period passes, every day is better and the time begins to flow again. "

And yet the response from Margolka: "The pain eventually passed, now is great, but thirty years are just the start in life, so much can happen even good. Burial in depression is not a good idea, so you must by all means, whether pharmacologically or through therapy, to get out of this. I know, it's easy to say, but it can be realized, alone with this mess go out. A pity of our lives, we only have one and why to wake up after years with a sense of wasted time? ".